|
1) Children need to be able to fall asleep on their own.
Infants and toddlers who are always rocked to sleep, or
breastfed or bottle fed to sleep, learn to depend upon
others for falling asleep and do not develop their own
falling asleep mechanism. This can cause much distress
for parents who go through the nightly nightmare of trying
to get their infant or toddler to sleep. Instead of always
picking up and rocking a crying little one, which only
reinforces the child's dependency on you putting him or
her to sleep, try patting the child and then leaving for
a few minutes. If you keep coming in, patting your child
and reassuring him or her that you are here, eventually
your child will stop depending upon you to rock, hold
or feed him or her to sleep.
2) Children need to learn very young to play by themselves
and amuse themselves. It is not healthy for children to
be constantly dependent upon others, or upon the TV, to
amuse them. I work with many adults who never learned
to play by themselves. These adults feel lost when they
are alone, having no idea what to do with themselves.
Instead of turning to creative or learning opportunities,
they may participate in addictions such as eating, drinking,
drugs, TV, work, spending, and so on. When children learn
to play by themselves at a young age, they tend to be
more self-sufficient and creative as adult.
3) Children need to learn how to self-nurture. This means
that they need to learn how to take some responsibility
for their own feelings. Infants often self-soothe with
their blanket, thumb, or pacifier. But as they grow older,
they need to learn other ways of self-nurturing because
they will not be taking their blanket or pacifier to school.
Even children as young as 2 1/2 years old can learn to
attend to their own feelings. You can help your young
children start to take responsibility for their feelings
by giving them a doll or stuffed animal that represents
their emotions. You can tell them that the doll or stuffed
animal is the baby inside them that has a lot of different
emotions. When they are feeling sad or angry, they can
learn to talk to the baby inside and find out what that
baby needs from them or from you. As they get older, they
can learn to connect their thoughts with their feelings.
They can learn that if they judge themselves by telling
themselves that they are bad or stupid or ugly, they will
feel very badly.
It is vitally important for all of us to connect our
thoughts with our feelings. Most of us grew up believing
that others caused all our good and painful feelings.
If someone yelled at us or told us we were bad or stupid
or ugly, we certainly felt badly, and if someone approved
of us, we felt good. So we learned to believe that all
our feelings are being caused by others. It is important
for children to learn that their feelings are also affected
by what they tell themselves and how they treat themselves.
For example, if an older brother tells his younger brother
that he is stupid, the younger child might start to tell
himself he is stupid, without realizing that he is causing
himself to feel very badly. By talking with his baby,
he might realize he is treating himself in a way that
is hurting him.
He also might also be able to understand that his brother
is not telling him the truth. The way he can learn to
realize this is by learning to access his Source of Love
and Truth.
Small children can easily learn to open to a powerful
Source of Love and Truth. You can ask them to imagine
a wonderful friend, a guardian angel, or a fairy godmother.
It is very easy for most children to imagine a wonderful
being who is here to love them and guide them. They can
be encouraged to ask questions of this loving being, such
as "Is it true that I am stupid?”They can learn to
bring through true and loving statements to themselves
when they open to learning with their spiritual Guidance.
These skills, learned early in life, will do much to
foster personal responsibility in our children.
See More Related Articles:
- Tips for Streching
your Family's Budget
- Halloween Safety Tips
- How to Bottle
Feed Safely
- Constipation
in toddlers
- New Born Baby
Checklist
- Ovulation
And Conception
- Putting
Your Child To Bed
|